This is a joke; it is my attempt at some Big Pharma humor. The ChanceIt name and product line are my fictitious creations, and I am not in any way recommending or suggesting that any medicines should be taken by anyone.
Hello Loyal Customers
The Corporate family at ChanceIt Pharmaceuticals would like to take this opportunity to wish all our dependent customers a warm hello!
At ChanceIt, we value your dependency on our ever-growing list of highly addictive products. We appreciate your business so much that we made sure our drugs are even more addictive than in prior years.
With years of pharmaceutical research in our library and some of the brightest chemists under our employ, ChanceIt has taken no chances, pardon the pun, regarding patient retention. No, we’re pretty confident that we will report to all investors and healthcare consumers in America that business will continue to grow exponentially in the foreseeable future, as there’s no possible way for anyone to stop taking our prescription and over-the-counter products.
All of our drugs come straight to you, our entirely dependent customers, with no assurances from us regarding product safety or quality assurance.
At ChanceIt, we concentrate on making and distributing products in record time without the nuisance of prolonged drug trials and scientific research. Our philosophy has always been getting the products out as fast as possible and watching the short and long-term effects reported by healthcare consumers. In this way, we maximize the production of products and eliminate the annoying costs of performing scientific studies.
When we speak of double-masked studies, we’re really talking about looking the other way twice!
Our New Roll-The-Dice Vaccine
Beginning in 2026, ChanceIt Pharmaceuticals will enter the highly competitive COVID-19 vaccine market, with a particular focus on mRNA and other gene-altering technologies.
A Shot in the Dark…but who’s looking anyway?
Getting novel vaccine products out to an entirely new healthcare consumer group without the risk of legal backlash, thanks to our products falling under Emergency Use Authorization laws, will help our company achieve the highest corporate profits in our long lucrative history.
Remember, when it comes to your health, ChanceIt is always willing to roll the dice. Are you ready to take our products in 2026 and just ChanceIt?
Products Disclaimer:
There simply aren’t enough words in any language to effectively describe the health risks and physiological insults a human body could incur from taking our medicines. But we’re putting this shit out there regardless and betting you’re willing to risk your life anyway.
Counter Punching…
I’m tired of taking jabs from Big Pharma, and at NoFakeNews, I write articles to counter punch an industry I believe is destroying humanity’s health. If I can’t throw a few literary jabs at the opposition each week, I don’t feel quite right. 🤣
The Big Pharma Punching Bag
Take two jabs and write another article in the morning!
Target List – A Feature Film
Click on the Image to watch the movie
